AN ARTIST STATEMENT If I were an artist my work would reside in a realm of existence parallel to this one, and this emotionally accessible yet physically unattainable realm would be utopic. If I were an artist the content of my inner self would channel through my materials upon contact - my deepest fears and most earnest hopes exhausted into my work in an effort to reach communal understanding. If I were an artist I would never struggle with the validity of my own autonomy because I would understand the value of my actions in relation to yours. If I were an artist I would speak with and to but never for a viewer and my end of the conversation would ultimately be imploring, "Hey, listen, I'm here." If I were an artist my work would seemingly let you know that I understand how it feels to watch a car insurance commercial. If I were an artist my work would have no more cultural significance than an MTV reality show. If I were an artist my work would be an opportunity for the both of us to hold hands and skip off into the sun setting over a dusty Western plain. If I were an artist I would inherently assume that you hate me and I would be really angry about that because it's like, what the fuck? I made this for you, y'know. If I were an artist my work would ask you a question and if you ignored it I would follow you home desperately and keep asking you and when you slammed the door in my face I would figure out how to use my house key to open up your dining room window and come inside to attempt further asking and I wouldn't stop these efforts to convince you to engage with me in conversation until they resulted in the police being called because you had impulsively grabbed a serrated-edge kitchen knife and stabbed me in my upper arm and even then from either a hospital bed or a jail cell I would probably write you a letter still asking for a response, though the stab-wound might serve as something. If I were an artist I would address what it means to be human right now in a world in which there is Wal-Mart and there is Miley Cyrus and she sells red leopard-print jeans there and a flier is mailed to your home to tell you about it and that might be the only piece of mail you get that week aside from maybe another piece of mail asking you to sign up for a low-interest rate credit card through a very easy 3-step process. If I were an artist I would give more effort than I've ever given or have had an understanding of giving in order to make all of us feel a little less alone inside.